Now, there are a few guarantees in business. As an entrepreneur, I can assure you that you will have to be able to handle two things – change and disappointment.
Today, I want to talk to you about some of the strategies that are going to help you deal with those really big disappointments. Now, we all like good outcomes, of course we do. But in business, just as in life, we can’t always guarantee that we’re going to get the outcome that we wanted.
The D word describes how we might be feeling if an outcome falls short of what we were wanting. Now, it’s a word that we use or might use it when we’re talking to other people. We might say ‘I was disappointed we didn’t get the contract’ or ‘I’m disappointed that the sales revenue is down’. But it’s fair to say that it’s not a word that we associate with positivity, right? And just saying it or thinking about it enough can really have a negative impact on your mood.
What’s really interesting is that for some people, disappointment feels like an enormous setback. It’s going to knock them off track, shake their confidence, play on their mind and can ruin their day. But then for other people, disappointment just seems to roll off them like water off a duck’s back. They just treat it like an inevitable part of life, not something to dwell on. In short, they seem to handle disappointment easily and they don’t let it break their stride.
But why? Why is it not affecting them like it might affect you? It’s because they are resilient.
Now resilience is like emotional armour. It’s gonna give someone the ability to handle setbacks, to overcome adversity and bounce back from disappointment. People who have resilience don’t fear challenges, they just cope with them better.
The good news is that resilience is a skill. And as with any skill, it’s something that you can learn and work on.
So these are my five top tips for developing resilience.
Number one, be prepared.
Not everything’s gonna run smoothly in business, so it’s better to expect setbacks than to treat them like huge shocks when they do happen.
Here’s an interesting fact. Tiger Woods is the highest money earner in golfing history. He’s won 15 major championships, but the 359 tournaments he’s entered, he actually only won 82.
Now if he only ever prepared for victory, Tiger would have spent the majority of his life being disappointed.
Number two, you can build resilience by having a plan so when things don’t go perfectly, you can either sit and dwell on it, or you can crack on and do something positive.
If you already have a plan in place, you’ll be able to get on with executing the plan more quickly, and that in and of itself is more likely to improve the situation.
Having a plan doesn’t mean that you expect problems, it just means that they’re more manageable when they do occur. Think of it like keeping an umbrella in the boot of your car. That doesn’t affect the weather, but if it does rain, it’s going to keep you dry.
Number three, do not lust after a certain outcome.
This one’s going to sound a little bit zen, but some people focus entirely on one particular outcome and they treat anything other than that outcome as utter failure.
Now, in business, there are a huge number of variables. Every one of them can affect the outcome, many of which are totally outside of your control. So, instead of being fixated on just one outcome as being the definition of success, consider a range of outcomes that are all possible and all of which could be acceptable, could be seen as success.
For example, while some outcomes are more desirable than others, like selling X amount of stock or delivering Y amount of profit, selling A amount of stock and delivering B amount of profit might still be an outcome that is worth having.
Considering a range of outcomes instead of just one can reduce the feeling that there’s only one that represents a win and that every other outcome is a failure.
Number four, remind yourself tomorrow is another day.
Sometimes in the heat of the battle, receiving some bad news can feel totally overwhelming and disappointment can get amplified.
Take a deep breath, give yourself some space and put things into perspective. Resilience is the ability to bounce back, but it’s okay to give yourself a chance to vent. Swear under your breath, make yourself a cup of tea, whatever works for you. Giving yourself the chance to regroup and put the disappointment behind you is a really powerful tactic that’s gonna help you build your resilience.
Finally, point five, do not dwell on it.
Like I’ve just said, it’s okay to take a moment to reflect, but don’t linger on the disappointment. I know people who literally can stay disappointed in something for years. They just don’t want to get over the setback. It’s a mindset that they seamlessly feel more comfortable stuck in than a growth mindset that’s going to help them move forward.
If you find yourself dwelling on past disappointments, ask yourself the question, is what I’m thinking about actually helping me or is it hurting me?
If the thought that you’re having is hurting, then consciously push it from your mind and focus on a positive image of where you want to be. The more you start to apply the technique, the easier it becomes, and your resilience will build and build and go from strength to strength.
So remember, disappointment is a feature of being an entrepreneur. Nothing will go completely to plan all the time. You’ll have setbacks, you’ll have bad news, things will go wrong, but the way that you cope with that is what will define your success.
Use my strategies to consciously build your resilience and not only will you cope better with those inevitable issues, but you’ll feel braver, you’ll feel more confident and less averse to taking risks in business. Never forget, resilience conquers disappointment every single time!